Read online book The TurnAround Mom : How an Abuse and Addiction Survivor Stopped the Toxic Cycle for Her Family - And How You Can, Too! by Carey Sipp in EPUB, TXT
9780757305962 English 0757305962 "This book will help salvage many lives and restore homes to peace and sanity." -- George H. Gallup, Jr., chairman, The George H. Gallup International Institute "The TurnAround Mom is a model of recovery that creates the potential to end generational cycles of addiction." -- Claudia Black, Ph.D., author of It Will Never Happen to Me. If you grew up in a dysfunctional, abusive, or addictive home, you are intimately familiar with violence, uncertainty, and suppressing your feelings. What you may not know, though, is how to create a sane, structured, and serene home for your own family when you never experienced these things yourself. Now you can. Part courageous memoir, part influential how-to guide, The TurnAround Mom offers the tools you need to end the legacy of toxicity. With chilling vignettes from author Carey Sipp's own abusive past, plus the tips and techniques she used to turn her life--and thus the lives of her children--around, this stirring story will be the daily touchstone that you and your family deserve. Carey Sipp is a parent-education advocate, an addiction and abuse survivor, and the mother of two children. Visit the author at www.turnaroundmom.com, A "re-parenting" guide for parents who refuse to pass on the pain of growing up with addiction and abuse to their children. One in five Americans is a problem drinker. According to the National Association for Children of Alcoholics, that translates to close to 29 million children of alcoholics in the United States. The TurnAround Mom is a compelling guide for adults who grew up with addiction and abuse-and now, as parents themselves, want to do everything in their power to break the cycle. Think of it as a "re-parenting" guide, filled with real, honest techniques for redirecting the toxic tornado associated with addiction into actionable steps that will nurture and fulfill a family., A "re-parenting" guide that helps break the painful cycle of addiction and abuse. One in five Americans is a problem drinker. According to the National Association for Children of Alcoholics, that translates to close to 29 million children of alcoholics in the United States. The TurnAround Mom is a compelling guide for adults who grew up with addiction and abuseand now want to do everything in their power to break the cycle. Think of it as a re-parenting guide, filled with real, honest techniques for redirecting the toxic tornado associated with addiction. Part hopeful memoir, part serenity guide for parents, The TurnAround Mom offers: Gripping vignettes from Sipp's abusive childhood that will motivate healthy change, such as greater self-care and friend/family support systems Inspiring ideas for nurturing quiet, non-intense time with ones family Ways to establish and maintain strong boundaries "Tough, honest, and to the point about how to take responsibility for your life and your kids, no matter what the damage, destruction, and dysfunction in your own upbringing." Dr. Laura Schlessinger, author of Bad ChildhoodGood Life<, A?This book will, I'm certain, help salvage many lives and restore homes to peace and sanity, with its basic message: A?You've got to raise yourself before you can raise your children.'A? --George H. Gallup, Jr., chairman, The George H. Gallup International Institute A? The TurnAround Mom is a model of recovery that creates the potential to end generational cycles of addiction.A? -- Claudia Black, Ph.D . , author of It Will Never Happen to Me A?Everyone, including therapists, should read this down-to-earth book. It deepened my recovery, and I believe will touch your heart.A? -- John Lee, M.A. , author of Flying Boy and Growing Yourself Back Up A brave, tormented mother stands up and says, A?History will not repeat itself . . .A? If you grew up in a dysfunctional, abusive, or addictive home, you are intimately familiar with violence, uncertainty, and suppressing your feelings. What you may not know, though, is how to create a sane, structured, and serene home for your own family when you never experienced these things yourself. Now you can. Part courageous memoir, part influential how-to guide, The TurnAround Mom offers the tools you need to end the legacy of toxicity. With chilling vignettes from author Carey Sipp's own abusive past, plus the tips and techniques she used to turn her life--and thus the lives of her children--around, this stirring story will be the daily touchstone that you and your family deserve., Excerpts from The TurnAround Mom Mother is bruised and in a hurry I am three or four years old, sitting on a cold floor under the table in the kitchen. I have no idea whether it's the middle of the night or early in the morning. I only know that it is dark and that I am under the table watching Daddy hit Mother and push her into the refrigerator. I see their legs go back and forth in front of me. They move a lot. It's scary. I look up. I see him grab her hair and pull her across the kitchen. She hits at him with her broom. He grabs her shirt and it tears. My baby brother cries. I am quiet and can't move. This goes on for a long time. They are loud. She tries to ?shhh? Daddy. Daddy gets madder. Mother is bruised. She has bald places where her hair is pulled out. She cries. She is sad. Very sad. And she is busy. She rushes to put on her makeup. Hurries to pick up the cleaning lady. Drives fast to get the cleaning lady dropped off at our house so she won't be late to the office. Mother is afraid that if she is late to work she will get fired or ?talked to? by her boss. We are rushing for breakfast. To get to church. Choir. School. And I feel sick to my stomach. I throw up at school and don't tell anybody. We rush and then we wait. Wait for her to pick us up. Or for him to do it. If she's coming, she will be late. If he's coming, it will be scary. I lose either way. For a while my bed is a safe place. Then I have dreams that my bed is filled with spiders. When I cry about those spiders and try to claw them out of my hair, I wake up Mother and make her mad at me. She lets me sleep in her bed, but every move I make wakes her up and makes her madder and madder. When I am older I know that Daddy acts this way when he drinks. And that he gets angry very easily. He yells. Cuts furniture. Breaks windows. Threatens with knives and guns. Shoots holes in walls. Shoots a pistol at Mother and me. Throws Mother down the front steps when she is pregnant with my little brother. Hides a huge, live snake in the toolbox on his truck and then asks Mother to go get something out of it so she will find the snake and scream. Pulls a gun on my brother's friend. Drives fast and drunk with me bouncing around in the car. The list goes on and on. He is scary. And then he is sweet. Sad. Sorry. Dressed in a business suit. Looking normal. Giving us money. Pets. Stuff. We are all so tired. I am afraid. I do not like living under the table. Sane Ways to Avoid Toxic Intensity Ways to Avoid Toxic Intensity 1. If your life is filled with anxiety'drama over relationships, tension about money, stress about work and other major issues, consequences of drinking or using drugs'stop trying to handle it all on your own. Get help from a mental health professional and find an appropriate twelve-step support group, be it Al-Anon for friends and family members of alcoholics, CODA for people who struggle with issues of co-dependence, Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous, or other groups that deal with your concerns. There are support groups for everything from love and relationship addiction to overeating to emotions to money mismanagement. Do not suffer. If you don't have money for therapy, simply go to the twelve-step program best suited for you. These programs are free. You will find help there. It's likely that the longer you suffer, the greater the effects of your problem. 2. If you are the parent of a young child, it is especially crucial that you get help with whatever problem is causing your anxiety. Your child is literally immersed in and surrounded by whatever you are going through because children don't have the ability to block out the feelings of those around them the way adults do. Though your child may not seem aware of your tension, the feelings he or she is absorbing are bound to have an eff, If you grew up in a dysfunctional, abusive, or addictive home, you are intimately familiar with violence, uncertainty, and suppressing your feelings. What you may not know, though, is how to create a sane, structured, and serene home for your own family when you never experienced these things yourself. Now you can.Part courageous memoir, part influential how-to guide, The TurnAround Mom offers the tools you need to end the legacy of toxicity. With chilling vignettes from author Carey Sipp's own abusive past, plus the tips and techniques she used to turn her life--and thus the lives of her children--around, this stirring story will be the daily touchstone that you and your family deserve.Carey Sipp is a parent-education advocate, an addiction and abuse survivor, and the mother of two children. Visit the author at www.turnaroundmom.com
9780757305962 English 0757305962 "This book will help salvage many lives and restore homes to peace and sanity." -- George H. Gallup, Jr., chairman, The George H. Gallup International Institute "The TurnAround Mom is a model of recovery that creates the potential to end generational cycles of addiction." -- Claudia Black, Ph.D., author of It Will Never Happen to Me. If you grew up in a dysfunctional, abusive, or addictive home, you are intimately familiar with violence, uncertainty, and suppressing your feelings. What you may not know, though, is how to create a sane, structured, and serene home for your own family when you never experienced these things yourself. Now you can. Part courageous memoir, part influential how-to guide, The TurnAround Mom offers the tools you need to end the legacy of toxicity. With chilling vignettes from author Carey Sipp's own abusive past, plus the tips and techniques she used to turn her life--and thus the lives of her children--around, this stirring story will be the daily touchstone that you and your family deserve. Carey Sipp is a parent-education advocate, an addiction and abuse survivor, and the mother of two children. Visit the author at www.turnaroundmom.com, A "re-parenting" guide for parents who refuse to pass on the pain of growing up with addiction and abuse to their children. One in five Americans is a problem drinker. According to the National Association for Children of Alcoholics, that translates to close to 29 million children of alcoholics in the United States. The TurnAround Mom is a compelling guide for adults who grew up with addiction and abuse-and now, as parents themselves, want to do everything in their power to break the cycle. Think of it as a "re-parenting" guide, filled with real, honest techniques for redirecting the toxic tornado associated with addiction into actionable steps that will nurture and fulfill a family., A "re-parenting" guide that helps break the painful cycle of addiction and abuse. One in five Americans is a problem drinker. According to the National Association for Children of Alcoholics, that translates to close to 29 million children of alcoholics in the United States. The TurnAround Mom is a compelling guide for adults who grew up with addiction and abuseand now want to do everything in their power to break the cycle. Think of it as a re-parenting guide, filled with real, honest techniques for redirecting the toxic tornado associated with addiction. Part hopeful memoir, part serenity guide for parents, The TurnAround Mom offers: Gripping vignettes from Sipp's abusive childhood that will motivate healthy change, such as greater self-care and friend/family support systems Inspiring ideas for nurturing quiet, non-intense time with ones family Ways to establish and maintain strong boundaries "Tough, honest, and to the point about how to take responsibility for your life and your kids, no matter what the damage, destruction, and dysfunction in your own upbringing." Dr. Laura Schlessinger, author of Bad ChildhoodGood Life<, A?This book will, I'm certain, help salvage many lives and restore homes to peace and sanity, with its basic message: A?You've got to raise yourself before you can raise your children.'A? --George H. Gallup, Jr., chairman, The George H. Gallup International Institute A? The TurnAround Mom is a model of recovery that creates the potential to end generational cycles of addiction.A? -- Claudia Black, Ph.D . , author of It Will Never Happen to Me A?Everyone, including therapists, should read this down-to-earth book. It deepened my recovery, and I believe will touch your heart.A? -- John Lee, M.A. , author of Flying Boy and Growing Yourself Back Up A brave, tormented mother stands up and says, A?History will not repeat itself . . .A? If you grew up in a dysfunctional, abusive, or addictive home, you are intimately familiar with violence, uncertainty, and suppressing your feelings. What you may not know, though, is how to create a sane, structured, and serene home for your own family when you never experienced these things yourself. Now you can. Part courageous memoir, part influential how-to guide, The TurnAround Mom offers the tools you need to end the legacy of toxicity. With chilling vignettes from author Carey Sipp's own abusive past, plus the tips and techniques she used to turn her life--and thus the lives of her children--around, this stirring story will be the daily touchstone that you and your family deserve., Excerpts from The TurnAround Mom Mother is bruised and in a hurry I am three or four years old, sitting on a cold floor under the table in the kitchen. I have no idea whether it's the middle of the night or early in the morning. I only know that it is dark and that I am under the table watching Daddy hit Mother and push her into the refrigerator. I see their legs go back and forth in front of me. They move a lot. It's scary. I look up. I see him grab her hair and pull her across the kitchen. She hits at him with her broom. He grabs her shirt and it tears. My baby brother cries. I am quiet and can't move. This goes on for a long time. They are loud. She tries to ?shhh? Daddy. Daddy gets madder. Mother is bruised. She has bald places where her hair is pulled out. She cries. She is sad. Very sad. And she is busy. She rushes to put on her makeup. Hurries to pick up the cleaning lady. Drives fast to get the cleaning lady dropped off at our house so she won't be late to the office. Mother is afraid that if she is late to work she will get fired or ?talked to? by her boss. We are rushing for breakfast. To get to church. Choir. School. And I feel sick to my stomach. I throw up at school and don't tell anybody. We rush and then we wait. Wait for her to pick us up. Or for him to do it. If she's coming, she will be late. If he's coming, it will be scary. I lose either way. For a while my bed is a safe place. Then I have dreams that my bed is filled with spiders. When I cry about those spiders and try to claw them out of my hair, I wake up Mother and make her mad at me. She lets me sleep in her bed, but every move I make wakes her up and makes her madder and madder. When I am older I know that Daddy acts this way when he drinks. And that he gets angry very easily. He yells. Cuts furniture. Breaks windows. Threatens with knives and guns. Shoots holes in walls. Shoots a pistol at Mother and me. Throws Mother down the front steps when she is pregnant with my little brother. Hides a huge, live snake in the toolbox on his truck and then asks Mother to go get something out of it so she will find the snake and scream. Pulls a gun on my brother's friend. Drives fast and drunk with me bouncing around in the car. The list goes on and on. He is scary. And then he is sweet. Sad. Sorry. Dressed in a business suit. Looking normal. Giving us money. Pets. Stuff. We are all so tired. I am afraid. I do not like living under the table. Sane Ways to Avoid Toxic Intensity Ways to Avoid Toxic Intensity 1. If your life is filled with anxiety'drama over relationships, tension about money, stress about work and other major issues, consequences of drinking or using drugs'stop trying to handle it all on your own. Get help from a mental health professional and find an appropriate twelve-step support group, be it Al-Anon for friends and family members of alcoholics, CODA for people who struggle with issues of co-dependence, Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous, or other groups that deal with your concerns. There are support groups for everything from love and relationship addiction to overeating to emotions to money mismanagement. Do not suffer. If you don't have money for therapy, simply go to the twelve-step program best suited for you. These programs are free. You will find help there. It's likely that the longer you suffer, the greater the effects of your problem. 2. If you are the parent of a young child, it is especially crucial that you get help with whatever problem is causing your anxiety. Your child is literally immersed in and surrounded by whatever you are going through because children don't have the ability to block out the feelings of those around them the way adults do. Though your child may not seem aware of your tension, the feelings he or she is absorbing are bound to have an eff, If you grew up in a dysfunctional, abusive, or addictive home, you are intimately familiar with violence, uncertainty, and suppressing your feelings. What you may not know, though, is how to create a sane, structured, and serene home for your own family when you never experienced these things yourself. Now you can.Part courageous memoir, part influential how-to guide, The TurnAround Mom offers the tools you need to end the legacy of toxicity. With chilling vignettes from author Carey Sipp's own abusive past, plus the tips and techniques she used to turn her life--and thus the lives of her children--around, this stirring story will be the daily touchstone that you and your family deserve.Carey Sipp is a parent-education advocate, an addiction and abuse survivor, and the mother of two children. Visit the author at www.turnaroundmom.com